New Season

(this is a picture of "Terrible Tilly" the lighthouse on Tillamook Rock just off the Oregon Coast. Many people died trying to build this lighthouse & today its a place where you can house your ashes, yes--those ashes left after you get creamated!)

I interviewed yesterday with my old stomping grounds KGNW where I interned at when I was in school for broadcasting. (I have my degree in Radio Broadcasting--you'd have to go back to the beginning of my blog to read about that & I started my blog after I graduated)

Anyway, I didn't exactly know what I was interviewing for except for a receptionist position. I did tell them I wasn't all that interested in that position since you dont' really get the opportunity to move into many radio jobs from there. Nothing wrong with being a receptionist & I'm in no way above that job. But they wanted me to come in anyway so they could touch base. So I went in, knowing I would have to turn them down, but wanted to remain hopeful that maybe there was a silver lining in all this. They did have a board operator job available, but from 7-12am--yeah I think you know what I thought of that shift! And to be honest, I don't have the skill set to meet what they are needing right now. yes they were more then willing to train me since the equipment & programming they use are unique in this market, but I didn't want to put them thru all that training to be in a shift that doesn't work for my family & me.
It was hard to turn them down. I can't say that I for sure had the jobs, but they need people so badly right now they were willing to work with me. But since the hours were based on the need, I couldnt' do it. I can't take a job just to take a job.
At the same time, I do realize I need to make a choice-- Do I want to do Radio or Not? Is that desire to do it still there? And am I willing to sacrifice part of my life to work on being in radio? (i.e. work sucky hours & shifts) How much can I sacrifice to gain a dream & is it a dream anymore?

Well, I knew I was there years ago when I graduated from radio & learned that you have to take on the sucky jobs to get anywhere in this business & its all about who you know to even get in it. Needless to say I wish I could find a happy medium & compromise.
I saw my old host, Thor & he kept bugging me to come back, help him, blah blah blah. And although I kept saying, "uh no Thor I dont' work for free anymore," something in me did say, Why not work for free? You can gain experience & these people want you. Ouch... Ok the whole volunteer thing I'm not very good at. Its my weak side when it comes to being a Christian. I suck at serving & I'll admit it. I'll serve in small ways, but I can't seem to really get down & just serve unless there is something in it for me. Isn't that awful!?
While I know that if I do serve, I will get something out of it, but I guess I look for tangible things vs the whole spiritual side of it. So selfish I know. I'm working on it.
But if I did volunteer for his show again (oh God help me!!) then in a round about way I would get something out of it. I would gain so much experience & make a place for myself. Sort of like a compromise, no?!

I plodded off to work last night feeling down. I'm trying really hard to find how to balance life. Being a parent/wife/christian/dreamer/writer is hard!! (notice how I threw in the writer thing? heh heh heh)

Why did I title this new season?
Well its definatly what I've been mentioning I feel like God is putting me thru & here we are going to have a new MC student soon. Eeekkk!!! My previous MC student, Chipo, is having a hard time thinking that a girl possibly (if the whole shift things work, otherwise boy) replace her in her room. But we refer to the room to this day as "chipo's room" anyway so either way if a girl or boy gets in there they are going to be confused!
But when we did have Chipo move in we were already going thru a lot of new changes in our lives as a family & then having the MC blessing upon this house was incredible! I can only imagine how far God is going to push us this time. Good.

Be blessed people!!